Embassy Day 12/23/2009

Today was Embassy day! Isaiah had another good night of sleep and I had gotten up fairly early to get him and I ready for what we thought was a 10 Embassy appointment. Something happened with paperwork for someone in our travel group not sure who or what and really does not matter much now since it was all resolved and worked out quickly. But it did mean we were ready early. This was my first experience packing what I thought was how many bottles and diapers I might need for the day out with Isaiah. (I was wrong!)

Okay so the vans came and got us from our guest house and then we went to the other guest house to get Monica, Audrey, Byron and their kids. Monica had arrived late Tuesday night due to weather delays and such and had only gotten to meet her daughter shortly before we were set to head to the Embassy. Audrey and Byron's son was wonderful and helped Monica in calming her daughter down. It was neat to watch how the kids all interacted with each other, especially the older ones with the young ones.

We got to the Embassy and had to drop everything electronic off up front. Which meant I have no photo documentation of the actual Embassy trip. While at the Embassy I ran into a couple I had met at the DC airport who was adopting with another agency. When they got Ethiopia they were informed that the child they were adopting was actually a twin, that the mom had not turned the other baby in at first and was no willing to place the baby up for adoption. So they immediately started the process of updating everything to adopted the twin. I could only imagine the emotions that come with finding that out. We were at the Embassy for what seemed a long time, but I guess in reality was about 2 hours. Isaiah played in the play area for a while but then got hungry. I made him a bottle and fed him, and then placed him in my carrier to see if I could get him to go to sleep. He eventually did and woke up just as I was called to go upstairs for my meeting with the Embassy official. I got nervous when they stated my paperwork said a child of a year and that Isaiah was not a year at referral time was I okay with that. I said of course, I thought my paperwork had said newborn, so was suddenly nervous. She said everything was fine and stamped my paperwork. Told me I would have everything the next day. This was a surprise to me. I had not booked plane flights home until the 30th because they told us our paperwork would not be ready until Monday with the Christmas holiday. Now we were all waiting to hear from Haile if this was true...if we got our paperwork on the 24th were we allowed to head home on the 25th.

After the Embassy we went to the Zebra Cafe for lunch. It was the first time that all the families got to sit down and talk together. Shortly after we got served lunch it started to rain. The roof leaked on the restaurant and there were quickly people shifting, moving and grabbing stuff up to keep it from getting wet. Isaiah still was not really eating and by this point in the trip I was getting pretty sick..did not realize it until I got home, but yeah by then I was not really eating anything but breakfast. Once we all finished lunch we went back to the guest house for the rest of the day. Most of us went to our rooms to nap kids that needed naps and just generally recover from a busy and slightly stressful morning.

Gotcha Day for my travel partners

12/22/09

Isaiah slept for almost 12 hours that first night we were together. I was shocked and totally excited. I had heard from so many families about sleeping hardships so I was prepared to not get sleep and so amazingly blessed to get a child that slept. Now eating that was a different story for us. I was told that he was drinking four bottles a day and eating rice cereal. I tried all day Monday to get him to eat rice cereal and he never would, so at bedtime I gave up, and just mixed rice cereal into his bottle and gave it to him that way. I tried cereal again Tuesday morning, but still did not prevail in getting him to eat it and only succeeded in upsetting him, so decided rice cereal mixed in formula was the way to go for the rest of the trip. I would tackle food when we were home.

I was so glad to have Isaiah Yabsira in my arms, but had the jitters in my stomach because today was the day the rest of the travel group were getting to meet their kids. I had really debated on how to handle the morning. I love photography and wanted to be able to document for people, especially Jen their "gotcha days." I also wanted to make it as easy as possible for Isaiah and was worried that seeing the nannies again may upset him so I made the decision to place him with the guest house nannies while I took pictures for other people. He fell asleep just before the kids arrived in the carrier on me so it was pretty easy to hand him over to the guest nanny and Tigist.

Shortly after ten, I believe, the van pulled up with the kids. It was so fun to watch. There were 3 babies coming to families and then Lisa and Nate's two children and the Laura's toddler. Pretty quickly families found their way to different areas of the court yard to try and soothe and focus on their kids. I stayed with Jim for a little bit taking video and pictures of Gav for him and Jen. After a few minutes Jim took Gav upstairs to feed him and calm him down. I stayed downstairs snapping pictures :) I am so glad I did for I love looking at the pictures of the kids then and seeing them now. What a change in these precious children.

The rest of the day was spent getting to know kids and families getting to know each other as well. I believe this was the day Laura's brother went to go run to the store and was gone a little longer than we anticipated. A group of people on the street had convinced him to go somewhere with them and I believe had had some of his money taken. For me and probably for several other travelers it was the reality of all the warnings we had received prior to coming.

Day 3- Exploring Addis

Sunday was the day that was probably the loneliest for me. Audrey and Byron headed off in the early morning to Lalibela, Jim was still with his friends and the other families had not arrived yet. I had become friends with the Guest House workers and so did get to talk with them a little. I also met a man who is Ethiopian but is a pastor in NJ and his niece, I believe, who still lives in Ethiopia. This is also the day that if people in the US had known what I was doing I probably would have been yelled at, a lot!

I woke up at a fairly reasonable hour and went down and had breakfast. Haile, the guest house worker not the adoption agency worker, made me amazing eggs for breakfast. It became my stable food everyday! After breakfast I hung around downstairs for awhile trying to decide what to do with my day. I wanted to shop but was a little nervous about going out on my own. I had been warned to not do that and was not sure I truly wanted to ignore those warnings. Especially after Byron's camera had been stolen from the car we were in the day before. I decided I was probably going to go take and nap and then ask the guest house staff if someone could take me shopping.

As I was preparing to head back upstairs I met a nice man and his daughter. His daughter had come to Ethiopia, her fathers homeland, from Germany to work in some orphanages for several months. He was down visiting her and seeing family and they were staying at the guest house as well. I loved sitting and talking to them for a while. Then the pastor came down to have breakfast. He mentioned that they were going to church and asked if I wanted to go. I said yes without hesitation. The chance to experience church in Ethiopia excited me. So I ran upstairs got my self organized and changed and headed back down to go to church. I left with the pastor and his niece. About the time we got in the cab to head to church I had a fleeting moment of doubt. I had just done what I promised people I would not do, I was out and about in Ethiopia essentially alone. I realized no one in the guest house had seen me leave and so no one had any idea where I was. I had just left, headed in to some part of Ethiopia with people I had barely met the night before. And to be honest had no idea how to get back to where I was staying if the need arose. Moment of panic....calm and trusted that all would be okay. And obviously as I sit here today to write this it was all okay.

We got to church, it was in this big almost warehouse like building. Not the churches in my pictures or that I had seen the day before. We walked around back as service was already started, so I thought. We sat down in the back and listened to the music. I understood not one word but it was beautiful. Then about 15 minutes later, it ended and people began to file out and those of us in the back began to file forward. Up I moved with my companions to sit closer to the front. I had witnessed the end of one service and the next one was beginning. There was a camera set up in the middle life feeding video into the room beside this main room for the other people to see. I looked around and had a very humbling moment. I was the only white person in the room. And I am guessing in just that one room there were over a thousand people. Now I am not one that is usually intimidated by being different from the crowd, but for a moment I felt a bit uncomfortable. I stuck out! And quickly I realized this was just the beginning of me "sticking out" here I was a white American woman in Ethiopia asking these people to accept me and the fact that I was adopting one of their children. I was asking by my presence to be accepted into this "family".

To this day I stick out..Isaiah is a beautiful dark chocolate brown and it is the dead of winter..I am white :) But he and I are family, there is no doubt that he is my son, born of another mother in a land far from my home. I have been blessed to have a child that challenges me to push the boundaries of societies acceptance here in the US and maybe even there in Ethiopia. I think people were a bit shocked to see me sitting in that church. Listening to a 2 hour service conducted in English and Amharic, praising with my sons people. Embracing his culture, his history, and his future. After about 2 hours or so services ended and we headed back to the guest house. Now I really was tired and I took a nap. I talked to Haile and he said he would bring Isaiah to me in the morning. He was not sure exactly what time but probably 10ish. I was a little over 12 hours away from meeting my son. Nervous set in.

Thankfully Tigist, the other guest house front desk clerk and Johnie kept track of me. They made me eat dinner, from Zola's again. They also told me it was okay for me to walk to coffee shop on the corner, was the Ethiopian version of Starbucks. The guest house guard took me out a bit but shopping is limited on Sunday in Ethiopia. Sunday was a personal growth day for me, I experienced truly being a minority, trusting my instincts to trust people and the knowledge that Ethiopia was in my heart.

Sleeping Sunday night was not really going to happen. Monday was Gotcha Day. No one from my travel group was going to be there to witness it. Isaiah and I were becoming a family under the watchful eyes of the Ethiopian people, with the assistance of my new friends to document it happening. It is interesting to look back now and see how the whole Gotcha Day became much more focused on his comfort, his transition and not on me becoming a mom. A shift I am so grateful for, but more of that tomorrow...

One year ago...

One year ago today I was packing, pacing and honestly panicking as I was getting ready to board a plane to Ethiopia. I had never really traveled out of the country and here I was about to travel far from home, by myself to start my family. While I left North Carolina alone, I soon met up with another adoptive parent, Jim, in DC and by the time I was coming home from Ethiopia I was anything but alone, I had my son and 7 other families forever in my heart. I am forever connected to these familiesregardless of the distance that is between all of us! I can hardly believe a year has passed over the next few days I will share what my trip was like, how it has changed me and how blessed I am today. Tomorrow was just my day of travel so not much to share on the 18th, but starting the 19th I will have arrived in Ethiopia. Please check back each day to see my trip.